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::I am a Dutch user and I life in the province of Zuid-Holland. My main goal for joining this wiki was adding a list of about a hundred Dutch wikis to Wikiindex, improving existing Dutch wikis and promoting Dutch heritage. I have already added several wikis when I decided that I wanted to join this site and help out under my own name.
{{TOC right}}<div style=float:right>{{Country (nl-n)}}</div>
I am a [[:Category:Netherlands|Dutch]] user and I live in the province of {{tag|Zuid-Holland}}. My main goal for joining this wiki in March 2014 was adding a list of about a hundred [[:Category:Wiki Dutch|Dutch wikis]] to Wikiindex, improving existing Dutch wikis and promoting Dutch heritage. I have already added several wikis when I decided that I wanted to join this site and help out under my own name.


::If you have any questions, you can talk to me on my talkpage.
If you have any questions, you can talk to me on my talk page.


== A Story ==
::''Presently enjoying: History of [[:Category:Netherlands|the Netherlands]], progressive rock and helping my family move.''


::::: ''A man moves into a new neighbourhoods and decides to go drink an ale at the local pub.''
===Dutch wiki's on the Internet Archive===
::::: ''After he drank his ale he exclaims: I am a man who fears no-one and therefor I will not pay for this drink.''
[https://archive.org/search.php?query=vlaams%20OR%20nederlands%20OR%20hollands%20OR%20flemish%20OR%20dutch%20AND%20wiki%20NOT%20wikimedia link Internet Archive]
::::: ''He then leaves the pub.''
::::: ''After doing this every evening for a week the pubowner visits an old friend of his, an ex-boxers.''
::::: ''He tells him he has a man who comes in, orders an ale and then refushes to pay.''
::::: ''The ex-boxers accepts to visit his pub that evening and talk to the man.''
::::: ''When the clocks strikes 10 o'clock the man enters the pub and asks for his ale.''
::::: ''The ex-boxer approaches him and says to the man: I heared you are a man who fears no-one.''
::::: ''The man says: That's me.''
::::: ''Then the ex-boxer leans over and awnser: Well, I too am a man who fears no-one''
::::: ''The man looks him in the eyes and awnsers...''
::::: ''Oh, in that case: WAITER TWO ALE!''


== Belgian jokes ==
==A Story==
:: ''A man moves into a new neighbourhoods and decides to go drink an ale at the local pub.''
:: ''After he drank his ale he exclaims: I am a man who fears no-one and therefor I will not pay for this drink.''
:: ''He then leaves the pub.''
:: ''After doing this every evening for a week the pubowner visits an old friend of his, an ex-boxer.''
:: ''He tells him he has a man who comes in, orders an ale and then refuses to pay.''
:: ''The ex-boxers accepts to visit his pub that evening and talk to the man.''
:: ''When the clocks strikes 10 o'clock the man enters the pub and asks for his ale.''
:: ''The ex-boxer approaches him and says to the man: I heard you are a man who fears no-one.''
:: ''The man says: That's me.''
:: ''Then the ex-boxer leans over and awnser: Well, I too am a man who fears no-one''
:: ''The man looks him in the eyes and answers...''
:: ''Oh, in that case: WAITER TWO ALE!''


::::: ''Why does a Belgian take a full and empty glass to bed?''
==Belgian jokes==
::::: ''The full one is for drinking when he is thirsty,''  
:: ''Why does a Belgian take a full and empty glass to bed?''
::::: ''The empty one is for drinking when he is not thirsty.''
:: ''The full one is for drinking when he is thirsty,''
:: ''The empty one is for drinking when he is not thirsty.''


::::: ''After years of studying aeronautical problems, the Belgians have finally invented something.''
:: ''After years of studying aeronautical problems, the Belgians have finally invented something.''
::::: ''What you ask?''
:: ''What you ask?''
::::: ''A helicopter with an ejector-seat.''
:: ''A helicopter with an ejector-seat.''


::::: ''A Dutchmen, a German and a Belgian are traveling on an aeroplane.''
:: ''A Dutchmen, a German and a Belgian are traveling on an aeroplane.''
::::: ''Suddenly the plane crashes to the ground.''
:: ''Suddenly the plane crashes to the ground.''
::::: ''There are only two parachutes, but the Dutchmen urges the Belgian to take his parachute and jump out.''
:: ''There are only two parachutes, but the Dutchmen urges the Belgian to take his parachute and jump out.''
::::: ''The German faces the Dutchmen and tells him that it was very brave of him to choose death.''
:: ''The German faces the Dutchmen and tells him that it was very brave of him to choose death.''
::::: ''The Dutchmen looks the German in the face and says...''
:: ''The Dutchmen looks the German in the face and says...''
::::: ''That wasn't my parachute, that was my backpack.''
:: ''That wasn't my parachute, that was my backpack.''


== Father ==
==Father==
:: ''Two women are talking to each other at the social club,''
:: ''One woman says to the other: O, dear I haven't slept well in over a week.''
:: ''How so the other woman asks.''
:: ''Well my husband broke his leg last week and the doctor forbade him from using the stairs.''
:: ''Then whats the problem, the other woman asks.''
:: ''Well, since he can't use the stairs to get to our bedroom, he spends every evening climbing up the downspout.''


::::: ''Two woman are talking to each other at the social club,''
==The Doctor==
::::: ''One woman says to the other: O, dear I haven't slept well in over a week.''
:: ''A Turk visits the doctor, he tells the doctor:''
::::: ''How so the other woman asks.''
:: ''Whena I toucha here, ita hurt. Whena I toucha there, ita hurt. Doctor watta wrong with me.''
::::: ''Well my husband broke his leg last week and the doctor forbade him from using the stairs.''
:: ''The doctor takes a close look at the man and says:''
::::: ''Then whats the problem, the other woman asks.''
:: ''I see the problem, your finger is broken.''
::::: ''Well, since he can't use the stairs to get to the bedroom, he spends every evening climbing up the downspout.''
 
:: ''A Jew visits the doctor, he tells the doctor:''
:: ''When I touch my side, here, I feel a terrible pain.''
:: ''The doctor takes a close look at the man and says:''
:: ''I see the problem, your wallet is empty.''
 
:: ''A fool visits the doctor, he tells the doctor:''
:: ''I have such a terrible backacke, I can't sleep.''
:: ''The doctor takes a close look at the man and says:''
:: ''Of course you have backpain, you carry the weight of your own foolishness.''
 
[[Category:Wiki people]]
[[Category:Jokes]]
[[Category:Account used in 2014]]

Latest revision as of 17:50, 29 May 2024

I am a Dutch user and I live in the province of Zuid-Holland. My main goal for joining this wiki in March 2014 was adding a list of about a hundred Dutch wikis to Wikiindex, improving existing Dutch wikis and promoting Dutch heritage. I have already added several wikis when I decided that I wanted to join this site and help out under my own name.

If you have any questions, you can talk to me on my talk page.

Presently enjoying: History of the Netherlands, progressive rock and helping my family move.

Dutch wiki's on the Internet Archive[edit]

link Internet Archive

A Story[edit]

A man moves into a new neighbourhoods and decides to go drink an ale at the local pub.
After he drank his ale he exclaims: I am a man who fears no-one and therefor I will not pay for this drink.
He then leaves the pub.
After doing this every evening for a week the pubowner visits an old friend of his, an ex-boxer.
He tells him he has a man who comes in, orders an ale and then refuses to pay.
The ex-boxers accepts to visit his pub that evening and talk to the man.
When the clocks strikes 10 o'clock the man enters the pub and asks for his ale.
The ex-boxer approaches him and says to the man: I heard you are a man who fears no-one.
The man says: That's me.
Then the ex-boxer leans over and awnser: Well, I too am a man who fears no-one
The man looks him in the eyes and answers...
Oh, in that case: WAITER TWO ALE!

Belgian jokes[edit]

Why does a Belgian take a full and empty glass to bed?
The full one is for drinking when he is thirsty,
The empty one is for drinking when he is not thirsty.
After years of studying aeronautical problems, the Belgians have finally invented something.
What you ask?
A helicopter with an ejector-seat.
A Dutchmen, a German and a Belgian are traveling on an aeroplane.
Suddenly the plane crashes to the ground.
There are only two parachutes, but the Dutchmen urges the Belgian to take his parachute and jump out.
The German faces the Dutchmen and tells him that it was very brave of him to choose death.
The Dutchmen looks the German in the face and says...
That wasn't my parachute, that was my backpack.

Father[edit]

Two women are talking to each other at the social club,
One woman says to the other: O, dear I haven't slept well in over a week.
How so the other woman asks.
Well my husband broke his leg last week and the doctor forbade him from using the stairs.
Then whats the problem, the other woman asks.
Well, since he can't use the stairs to get to our bedroom, he spends every evening climbing up the downspout.

The Doctor[edit]

A Turk visits the doctor, he tells the doctor:
Whena I toucha here, ita hurt. Whena I toucha there, ita hurt. Doctor watta wrong with me.
The doctor takes a close look at the man and says:
I see the problem, your finger is broken.
A Jew visits the doctor, he tells the doctor:
When I touch my side, here, I feel a terrible pain.
The doctor takes a close look at the man and says:
I see the problem, your wallet is empty.
A fool visits the doctor, he tells the doctor:
I have such a terrible backacke, I can't sleep.
The doctor takes a close look at the man and says:
Of course you have backpain, you carry the weight of your own foolishness.
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