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User talk:Abd: Difference between revisions
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→What RONR has to say about attacking a member's motives: brilliant justification for whining forever
Leucosticte (talk | contribs) |
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:People see behavior and infer motives for an obvious survival reason. If one has a frequent complaint that others incorrectly infer one's motives, and doesn't examine and shift the behavior that is leading to those inferences, it's a racket and one may look for the payoff. --[[User:Abd|Abd]] ([[User talk:Abd|talk]]) 14:25, 14 January 2015 (UTC) | :People see behavior and infer motives for an obvious survival reason. If one has a frequent complaint that others incorrectly infer one's motives, and doesn't examine and shift the behavior that is leading to those inferences, it's a racket and one may look for the payoff. --[[User:Abd|Abd]] ([[User talk:Abd|talk]]) 14:25, 14 January 2015 (UTC) | ||
::Was it a racket when the guy in ''Shawshank Redemption'' kept writing to the legislature over and over asking for a library? The idea is to complain until you get results. [[User:Leucosticte|Leucosticte]] ([[User talk:Leucosticte|talk]]) 15:23, 14 January 2015 (UTC) | ::Was it a racket when the guy in ''Shawshank Redemption'' kept writing to the legislature over and over asking for a library? The idea is to complain until you get results. [[User:Leucosticte|Leucosticte]] ([[User talk:Leucosticte|talk]]) 15:23, 14 January 2015 (UTC) | ||
:::The strategy can work. It often works when we are children, we whine and complain until our parents give in. Because most parents are not skilled at dealing with this (the manual was lost when a truck went off the road), people are created who believe that whining endlessly is a way to get things done in the world. The "guy" in that ''movie'' was not writing "to the legislature," he was writing to individual ''members'' of the legislature, each one was a new opportunity. (I have not seen the movie, so I'm talking about what might work in real life.) If the first letters produced no response, he shifted his content and arguments. He studied the members and determined what interested them and he appealed to their interests. He ''actually communicated,'' he did not just whine and complain. He delineated a problem and suggested practical solutions that considered the needs of his readers. | |||
:::Or he got lucky. | |||
:::Leucosticte, you know far more than you let yourself realize. You know what a "racket" is, you have done the training, but you aren't using it. A racket is not merely a "persistent complaint," it is a "persistent complaint combined with a fixed way of being." The prisoner in the movie had plenty of time. You do, as well, living with your parents and taking very little responsibility for yourself. Was he "complaining" or was he merely persistent? To know, we'd need to observe his affect. Was he upset by "no library"? | |||
:::"Fixed way of being" indicates that one is simply a machine, playing out old programs. While that's normal survival response, there are bugs in "normal." Let's say that to move beyond these bugs, these limitations, it's necessary to have ability to shift behavior, to drop prior "identity." Otherwise we can -- and do -- repeat the useless behavior until we die, always complaining that the problem is somewhere else, and that complaint completely distracts us from where we have power, over our own behavior. So the prisoner, I can imagine, learned how to get the attention of a staffer for a legislator, and how to move the legislator himself or herself. Had he persisted with his first efforts, perhaps on the idea that they were "right" and if he whined enough, he'd get what he wanted, what would have happened is ... nothing but more conviction that "they" were not going to listen to him and "they" were completely unjust and didn't care about people, especially not about convicts. --[[User:Abd|Abd]] ([[User talk:Abd|talk]]) 16:00, 14 January 2015 (UTC) | |||
== Danish-German Neonazi == | == Danish-German Neonazi == | ||